We Survived Week One Posted by:Sally--Tuesday, July 27, 2010

Week One is over...... Cisco has been back home since last Monday. Every day I am thankful for the help that we received and are still receiving for our son's recovery. I found out that two of his friends who he used to get high with are in very bad straits. This makes me realize that Cisco would be right there with them if he did not go into placement. Even he feels that he is a lucky kid. I liked Lloyd's post about labeling the good and bad behavior and I am doing
that. I checked out some text messages on Cisco's cell phone. One thing I was unhappy about was that he was in contact with an old friend who he should not contact so we had a good talk this morning. Then I confiscated the phone for a day.
He went to the wave pool with an appropriate friend today. He asked for the phone back before he left for swimming saying that I would not be able to get in contact with him.
I did not fall for that. He will get the phone back tomorrow as originally decided. It is
good to be a parent in control but trust me... Cisco does want to be in control
and does push for it. He makes me work to keep the control. I am glad we
fought to keep Cisco on probation and in the system and that we have the help
and support that we have because it makes my job a lot easier. He was not too upset about me taking his phone. I am learning that when I stand firm he seems to realize that he cannot sway me. Now he did ask for the phone this evening and my answer was still, "No, you will get your phone back tomorrow morning". He only asked once and he accepted the answer. I thanked him for his mature attitude; labeling the good bahavior.
He asked for his phone first thing this morning. I asked him if he wanted to do something with me. Either work out at the gym or go out to eat breakfast. He chose to go to breakfast with me. I told him I would give him the cell phone for him to charge it for later use but I did not want him to take it to the restaurant with us. He was okay with this idea.
We had a very enjoyable breakfast. Cisco was attentive and we talked about his biological family and about how much fun his adoptive grandma used to be. He liked the fact that she used to play video games with him even though she was in her eighties. She actually wasn't too bad at it he mused. I recalled that my mom confessed to me that she enjoyed playing but mostly just kept pushing all buttons as quickly as possible and had no clue what she was doing! I kept that information to myself. His best comment was that even though he was not her biological grandchild he felt her love was so genuine and sincere. I cannot thank her for this because she has passed away but in my heart I thank her for this every day. Grandparents are just so special for teenagers and they leave a lasting impression on them.
I encourage grandparents to join us at PSST meetings since they are such an important part of their teenage grandchildren's lives.