"One Down, One to GO" Story by Max (A PSST Parent) Posted by:Sally--Monday, July 19, 2010

"One Down, One to GO" Story by Max
For those of you who have read my previous postings, David is my younger of 2 boys. He doesn't realize it yet but he is a lucky guy. At this moment his dad is escorting him to his new boarding school in Utah.

Why school now in the middle of summer, why all the way in Utah - these are the most frequently asked questions. I always answer in the most streamlined way; because this is a different type of school that has rolling admission; they accept kids 365 days a year.

Utah is a rugged place with lots of opportunity for out door experiential therapies and regular fun activities.

Yes, it's very far from Pittsburgh, no, he can't come home whenever he wants, but we will visit him and have family therapy via conference call weekly.

No cell phones or cigarettes allowed. Does any of this sound remotely familiar to anyone?

Sounds like placement in a D&A facility like Gateway Yes, or similar.

Only parents that have toyed with this type of placement would really understand that although we love them and wish they could stay at home, it is better for all sides to be sent elsewhere - at least for the time being. I know my PSST friends understand with zero justification.

David's path to this point has already been documented in 2 previous blogs (Max and Mel's Terrible Adventure Part I & Max and Mel's Terrible Adventure Part II) - feel free to read.

Bottom line for David is that there was no private school in Pittsburgh that would take him with the combination of poor grades and oppositional behaviors, and public school is now out of the question - we are involved in our kids school and always have been, but it isn't a reciprocal relationship. His public high school where his brother Michael is currently falls through crack after crack was not an option. He would be sliding the already slippery slope.

So my husband Mel and I did some research and hired an educational consultant. We explained what we were hoping for; a school that would understand a kid like David and the terrible year of school, bad friends and marijuana that he experienced.

A place where he couldn't be kicked out of for being oppositional, or even cursing at a teacher, sneaking a cigarette, or having a dirty urine screen.

A place that will get him back to the athlete he was before marijuana use made him a slug.

A place that will teach him how to learn so there is a chance that he won't find school so miserable and may actually learn something.

A place that helps him get his big personality down to manageable size.

Since David was only on an extended contract and not formally charged, some of the placements in our area would have been inappropriate. He wasn't actually in the system.

We have the experience of his older brother Michael to relate to, (also in previous blog "Max and Mel's terrible adventure; the prequel") so we understood basically what was out there.

We also know our son very well, and understood his best chance was to remove him from Pittsburgh altogether to a place that is dedicated to helping trouble teens like David. We are fortunate we are able to send him, and he as I said is a lucky guy. In retrospect he will see this.

It was difficult to make the decision, difficult to tell him, difficult to get him there - but this morning at 5 A.M. he willingly got into the car to go to the airport.

Perhaps there is a part of him that understands by now why he is going, that he needs to go. All I know is, I don't feel like crying right now, because I spent the last year crying and worrying. He is now in a safe place. Maybe I can relax a bit and take a deep breath before embarking on the next chapter of our other son Michaels' treatment...stay tuned!