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Quote of the Week
"If I cannot do great things, I can do small things in a great way" ~ Martin Luther King, Jr.
Texting and driving so dangerous
Posted by:Lloyd Woodward--Friday, January 10, 2014
Posted by:Lloyd Woodward -- Friday, January 10, 2014 0 comments-click to comment
No Resolution – Just Change (written by Roxie)
Posted by:Jenn--Friday, January 10, 2014
"Happy New Year”, Roxie declares to the parents of PSST!
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Posted by:Jenn -- Friday, January 10, 2014 2 comments-click to comment
Marijuana & the Teenage Brain
Posted by:Jenn--Friday, January 03, 2014
A new study suggests that heavy marijuana use in the teenage years could damage brain structures vital to memory and reasoning. Although the results of the study do not provide proof of a cause-&-effect relationship, they raise valid concerns for parents of teenagers.
“We see that adolescents are at a very vulnerable stage neurodevelopmentally,” said lead researcher Matthew Smith of the Northwestern University Feinberg School of Medicine in Chicago. “And if you throw stuff into the brain that’s not supposed to be there, there are long-term implications for their development.”
For the full article, click here.
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Posted by:Jenn -- Friday, January 03, 2014 0 comments-click to comment
Don't be a Party to Teenage Drinking!
Posted by:Jenn--Sunday, December 29, 2013
See this recent article about a father facing charges after his son's party leads to a drunk driving death.
Here are the facts: If you make alcohol available at teenager parties, you can be prosecuted. If you allow teen drinking parties in your home, you can be prosecuted. So parents, please protect yourselves and your kids — don’t be a party to teenage drinking. Do your part to help make this holiday season safe for everybody.
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Posted by:Jenn -- Sunday, December 29, 2013 0 comments-click to comment
Twas the Night Before Christmas...
Posted by:Lloyd Woodward--Tuesday, December 24, 2013
Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the house
The stockings were hung by the chimney with care,
In hopes that St. Nicholas soon would be there.
We thought our teenager was snug in his bed,
Or listening to his music, ear phones stuck on his head.
And mamma in her ‘kerchief, and I in my cap,
Had just settled our brains for a long winter’s nap.
When out on the lawn there arose such a clatter,
I sprang from the bed to see what was the matter.
Away to the window I flew like a flash,
Tore open the shutters and threw up the sash.
The moon on the breast of the new fallen snow
Gave the luster of mid-day to objects below.
When, what to my wondering eyes should appear,
But my teenage son and some friends he holds dear.
From experience I knew what was happening quick,
I knew in a moment stealing our car was his trick.
More rapid than than eagles I ran outside to our lane.
I cursed him, yelled and called my son a bad name!
“Now Son, what the hell! You have no permission
To drive our car with your friends or with this vixen!
For I could see that his new girlfriend was tall,
And very cute to my eyes, then my son cried, “run-a-way all!”
The car had been wrecked for my eyes did not lie
When I saw that the windshield was crushed and my son was all high!
So I rang 911, the emergency number I knew,
And soon there were police cars with blinking lights too.
And then, in a twinkling, I looked for the proof
Inside I saw beer bottles (and a bag of weed left on the roof.)
My son looked awful loaded and as he was turning around,
He saw that I was the one who had called the cops down.
His anger was plain from his head to his foot
as he gave me his most threatening look.
But I didn't care about any of his threats
because I knew that he had just bet his last bet.
His eyes – how red and blood shot they looked,
His cheeks were flushed and his red nose looked cooked!
His droll little mouth stunk with alcohol
yet still, he looked over at me and he called…
“Hey Dad, please tell the cops to go away,
You know I’ll be good - tomorrow’s Christmas Day!”
But the stump of a weed pipe he held tight in his teeth,
The cop noticed it and said, "I’ll take that please!"
“You’re under arrest- and your rights I will tell,
But you are on your way straight to Shuman, the teenager-Jail."
He spoke lots more words as he went about his work.
He cuffed my son and his friends and then he called them all jerks.
He confiscated the weed, the beer, and the blow-
Giving a nod, the cop said “It’s time to go.”
The police lights were flashing, the teenagers crying;
I knew my son was safer in jail than outside of jail dying.
My son put his head out the window and pleaded,
“Just one more chance, Dad, I know I can beat this
addiction and This time I won’t let you down.
Please, don’t let the cops take me downtown!
I sprang to my senses and searched for the words that were best,
“Happy Christmas to all, and to all -NEVERTHELESS!”
(Happy Christmas to all PSST parents both near and far and thanks for your support all year long. Without you all there is no PSST ;-)
(Written by Clement C. Moore and Lloyd Woodward and reprinted from 2009 PSST BLOG)
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Posted by:Lloyd Woodward -- Tuesday, December 24, 2013 3 comments-click to comment
Treating Drug Addiction
Posted by:Jenn--Friday, December 20, 2013
Principles of Effective Drug Addiction Treatment
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Posted by:Jenn -- Friday, December 20, 2013 0 comments-click to comment
PLEASE: No gifts for staff please!
Posted by:Lloyd Woodward--Saturday, December 07, 2013
However, Valerie, Julie and I are not permitted by County Policy to accept gifts. It's very difficult to say "No" because we do not want to offend and also because we appreciate our thoughtful and appreciative PSST parents. We are in a tight spot here so please be considerate and don't offer us anything. I believe that Wesley Spectrum has a similar policy so don't be offended if none of the fine Wesley Spectrum Family Therapists won't accept gifts either.
All of us want you all to know that the best gift that you can give us is just your presence at our meetings. Also, many of you have your ways of showing us that you appreciate us all year long. That's one of the reasons that we are so lucky! We know that you appreciate us. We appreciate you all as well. :-)
Just be there if and when you can -that's the best gift of all! Read More......
Posted by:Lloyd Woodward -- Saturday, December 07, 2013 5 comments-click to comment
Bright Ideas?!
Posted by:Jenn--Thursday, December 05, 2013
by Roxie
I prefer bright light, so I searched stores for 100-watt bulbs to brighten the dark, overcast environment of my home. After using three bulbs out of a 10-pack, I realized there were none remaining in a two-week period. Questioning Lenny brought about numerous defensive answers. I conclude that he involved himself and friends in smoking illegal substances out of the bulbs.
Posted by:Jenn -- Thursday, December 05, 2013 0 comments-click to comment
TRANSFORMATION
Posted by:Jenn--Monday, December 02, 2013
Transformation - written by Elizabeth
After one particular Saturday visit, Elizabeth needed time to gather her thoughts. She pulled over along a stream in one of Pennsylvania's National Forests. Elizabeth parked her car, and then looked up. She couldn't believe she was seeing hundreds of Tiger Swallowtail butterflies pouring from between the trees like a waterfall. The butterflies surrounded her car. She got out of her car and watched the butterflies fly towards the sun in a beam of sunlight. Forty or more swallowtails remained, while Elizabeth watched them dwindle down to two. Then, Elizabeth "Got It." Gwen was going to be more than just OK, and as Gwen now knows and accepts, she is on the earth for a great purpose!
This is a true story and a testament to the power of God's love.
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Posted by:Jenn -- Monday, December 02, 2013 3 comments-click to comment
This Year at Thanksgiving I'll Count all my Best Blessings Twice,
Posted by:Sally--Thursday, November 28, 2013
Originally Posted by:Sally -- Thursday, November 18, 2010
Sometimes life is difficult. We face many challenges and disappointments that we may find hard to accept. If your child is in placement and there is a chance that he or she will not be home for the holidays it is enough to make you cry.
Our son, Cisco, is in placement and even though I am a seasoned PSST mom; (I have been attending meetings for well over a year) there are times when I let our situation get the best of me. That is okay, sometimes I need to work through the lonely feelings and being sad sometimes allows me to do this.
Our family has a thirty-three year old tradition of gathering together to select and chop down our Christmas tree. Cisco has always enjoyed this romp in the woods. I have many happy memories of him trekking up a glistening hillside along side his older brother. The snow softly falling and both boys so young and healthy ...... it felt like we were in the middle of a Norman Rockwell Poster.
I especially remember one warm but wet Christmas season when he fell in the creek and was muddy from head to toe but still wanted to go straight to dinner at a restaurant afterwards, that one puts a smile on my face too.
Cisco will not be there this year. How do we fill that void?
Our kids each have their own personal box of Christmas ornaments. Cisco will not be there when we decorate the tree to put all his special hand-made ornaments on it.
He will be missed.
The toughest thing at any time of the year is opening the door to his empty, all too quiet bedroom. I cannot even describe how lonely that makes me feel.
If your family cannot be together because of addiction do not let it ruin your holiday. That would be like letting the addiction win another round. Instead count your blessings.
The top five things I am grateful for:
1. I am thankful for Cisco. He is alive. He ran away from an adult facility six weeks ago. He has been very sensible and respectful ever since his return.
2. I am thankful for Rocco. Thankful that Rocco and I are working together on this disease that affects the whole family.
3. I am thankful for the support we get from our other son, Frodo and our daughter-in-law, Feona and all our extended family.
4. We are very thankful of our PSST friends who are always there for us and understand our highs and lows.
5. We are very thankful for Val, Lloyd, Kathie and all the experts from Juvenile Probation, Wesley Spectrum and Gateway who empower us.
All of these wonderful people in my life help fill the loneliness that occurs when my son is in placement. I think I will count all of these blessings twice.
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Posted by:Sally -- Thursday, November 28, 2013 0 comments-click to comment
Mirror Mirror on the wall..
Posted by:Lloyd Woodward--Thursday, November 28, 2013
Happy Thanksgiving to all PSST parents everywhere! We love our parents at the meetings and also those of you who follow us on this blog and on our Yahoo Groups email.
Just a note to say that we fixed our search window. If you find anything interesting in our archives please post a comment to let us know what you found. I just put "Thankful" in the window and found the above post by Sally and I re-posted. The other day I put "Parent Rights" in the window and found a post that I wrote for July 4th 2012. It had been such a long time that I felt like I was reading someone else's post.
I stand behind that "Parent Rights" post but I couldn't help but notice that it says nothing of parent responsibilities. For example, of course it's a parent's right to disagree with experts (#12) and of course parents are really expert on their own children but what if a parents disagrees with most of the experts most of the time? What if a parent's disagreements with professionals undermines the treatment that a teenager is receiving in an inpatient program? Isn't it also a parent-responsibility to support rather than undermine the treatment that the teenager is there to receive? Sometimes Parent Rights and Parent Responsibilities collide.
For example, inpatient challenges the teen to take responsibility. In the beginning the teenager blames everyone else for his predicament. After a time in treatment he begins to see that he has played a role and that he has done that by making poor decisions. This is the sort of turn around we are hoping for and when the teenager stands up and says, "You know that's something that I have to change in myself," we all applaud!
It could very well be that the thing he glimpses that he needs to change is whether or not to continue to go through life as a victim!
For each of us there is plenty of evidence that we are victimized. We are victimized by so many situations and people on a daily basis: from the person who misinformed us about our new mortgage to the person at the grocery store who never should have bagged the bananas with the bleach!
Where does our responsibility come into it? We signed the mortgage so should we have known what we were signing? Should we have asked more questions? Maybe not but I'm just saying do we take the time to examine our role or are we eager to find someone to blame for each of our predicaments? Should we have watched the grocery person throw those two things into our bag? Perhaps that's something we expect not to have to worry about and yet, we are also there are we not?
Here's why this is so important. If we decide to go through life operating from a victim's stance then it becomes very difficult to change ourselves. Instead, we go through life trying to change everyone else and boy is that a frustrating endeavor! Once we decide to abandon our victim's stance, we begin to examine our role in things and that allows the spark that can start a blaze of self growth. Without that spark there is small chance for change.
As we have often said in this blog, one of the gifts that we can offer to our teenagers is good role-modeling. We will be imitated by our children. So, if we choose to act primarily as victims, we do little to help our teenager to grow up and become a responsible person. Raising responsible people, that's our job as parents and when we have our teen inpatient it's an ideal time to begin to become more responsible ourselves.
So, let's go back to disagreeing with the experts. Sure, we can and should do that; however, if we find that a couple of these experts are saying the same thing it should raise a questioning flag. Even if our opinion is that "they" are all incompetent and "they" are all wrong and we begin to feel like we know more than the psychiatrist, more than the family therapist, more than the social worker, more than the probation officer and more than the judge, then maybe it's time to realize that while we have the right to disagree with the experts we also have a responsibility to support the treatment that our teen is getting. If our disagreements range so large as to undermine the very treatment that our teen is getting and especially if our intervention continually reinforces the fact that our teen is a victim, that he isn't competent, and that he really can't do any better, then at the end of the day let's be thankful there are mirrors and let's find one and take a good look.
I am thankful that parents who attend PSST usually don't undermine the treatment that their teenager is in inpatient to receive! Happy Thanksgiving everyone!
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Posted by:Lloyd Woodward -- Thursday, November 28, 2013 3 comments-click to comment
PSST Tenth Anniversary / Holiday Celebration
Posted by:Jenn--Sunday, November 24, 2013
Posted by:Jenn -- Sunday, November 24, 2013 0 comments-click to comment
Thanks to "our" Fabulous Interns!
Posted by:Jenn--Saturday, November 23, 2013
Thanks to “our” fantastic Wesley Spectrum interns, Abby & Elizabeth, for sharing valuable information at our special PSST meeting today. The topics discussed were improving family communication (listening and dealing with conflict) and grief education/counseling. The parents who attended were in for a surprise, because we didn’t have to choose one of the two topics, instead we experienced both!
The information was helpful, and there was a lot of sharing within the group - even role-plays!
Posted by:Jenn -- Saturday, November 23, 2013 2 comments-click to comment
Mark Your Calendars for this Special Event on Sat, Nov 23!!
Posted by:Jenn--Sunday, November 17, 2013
You are invited to attend your choice of two educational groups open to the community and PSST parents. The groups will feature the topics of how to improve family communication (listening and dealing with conflict) and grief education/counseling. The workshops are free, and will be informative and interactive in nature.
Posted by:Jenn -- Sunday, November 17, 2013 4 comments-click to comment